The Secret Alliance of Granny’s Panties

Sorry for the late day posting. I have been very busy with my job search. Trying to find a job, is more work than actually having one! I think I am battling a small bout of the blues as well. I decided to motivate myself out of my funk yesterday and hit a 9:30 Zumba class. I love Zumba, the music, the moves, the chance to have fun and think I am super sexy shaking my “latin hips” when in reality I am totally uncoordinated and lack any rhythm what so ever. Of course, one of the highlights of Zumba, when I am lucky, they play Pitbull and you all know how much I love to work out to him! The exercise definitely started my day on the right foot (or my two left feet).

Then I was off to meet my mom at Kohl’s; I got a 30% off coupon in the mail which my mom wanted to use, but she needed to have a Kohl’s card. She never got one because she would always go to Kohl’s with my grandma. She would charge her purchases on my grandma’s card and pay her back. This was her first trip to Kohl’s with out my grandma and although it would seem like an easy errand, it was a bit of a challenge for my mom to be there with out her. I helped my mom pick out some really nice tops for her upcoming trip to Disney World with my nieces and nephew, as well as a few things for my step dad and a b-day present for Ka-Ka (no Ka-Ka, I’m not telling you what she got you). While we were there, I picked up a dress for myself and some new underwear. And then I got sad.

One of the quirky things about my grandma was that she bought everybody underwear for every holiday. I’m not just talking Christmas and birthdays. I mean EVERY holiday. Green ones for St. Patrick’s Day, Red or Pink for Valentine’s Day, Pastel Colors for Easter, Red White & Blue for Fourth of July, Orange for Halloween and Thanksgiving and of course Red and Green for Christmas. One Christmas, I received a pair for that played music. IM NOT KIDDING! It had a mini pouch on the waistband that held a removable musical button that  played Jingle Bells.

The thing that made these purchases even more amazing is that my grandma never drove, yet she would always manage to find these incredibly unique undergarments where ever she happened to go with her girlfriends. I always wondered who actually bought these bizarrely patterned underwear for themselves or if they were specifically developed for a secret alliance of grandmothers, who swore to provide their granddaughters with seasonally patterned underwear.

My sister and I both have overflowing underwear draws full of thongs, bikini, hipsters, and all styles in between. Making a conservative estimate, I could probably go 6 months wearing a new pair of underwear every day and never wearing the same pair twice. We ALWAYS have clean underwear. (I am sure you are wondering why I would need to buy more; well, as I am loosing weight, a lot of pairs just don’t fit right anymore so I have been slowly getting rid of them).

I didn’t count on my grandma for all my underwear needs, however, it always makes me laugh when I reach in to my underwear draw and pull out a pair with a candy corn pattern or ones covered in stars and stripes. I am sure now that my grandma has passed, my mom will take over the responsibility of finding and purchasing underwear for random holidays, but it will never quite be the same.

Photo Credits  – Women corset workers on strike walk down the street wearing undergarments from Kheel Center, Cornell University – on Flickr


2 thoughts on “The Secret Alliance of Granny’s Panties”

  1. I can just imagine how much fun your grandmother had picking out all of the underwear for all of you…what a fun memory. And I’m glad you could be there for your mom on her first trip to Kohl’s without her mother…I’m sure you made it much easier for her.

    So how’s the job hunt going? I know it’s not easy out there right now. Good luck!

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